Mother's Day 2018

Me with Carlye Hughes (L) and mother Jackie Hughes (R)
I called Jackie "Mother" for over 30 years.  I'm the lucky one.

Regular readers of The Randy Report know there are a few posts that I share annually.

I originally wrote this in 2015.

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Happy Mother's Day wishes to all those fabulous, wonderful mothers who teach and nurture us all.

When I was young, people felt sad for me because my mother passed away at a young age.  But the universe had another (maybe better?) plan for me.

Because so many women were sent my way to teach, support and love on me to bring me to here.  I think wisdom greater than mine knew it would all be more than ok.

This Mother's Day is my first without Jackie Hughes, who I called "Mother" for over 30 years. She passed last summer and nothing will ever be the same. But what she gave me, and shaped in me, lives on.

I loved the smile in Mother's voice. When she said my name it was musical and lilting. "Rannn-dy." She made me feel like I belonged. She was the center of the Hughes family. And we all knew it.

Memory:  Mother was an expert shopper. EXPERT. She knew how to befriend all the ladies at Neiman Marcus so they would hide items she wanted until they went on serious sale. Double markdowns. Triple markdowns. Then she'd buy. And hide the dresses in the back of the closet for months.

When she'd finally wear them, Coach (Father Hughes is the winningest high school basketball coach in the history of the U.S.) might compliment her, asking if that was new. Mother would reply - in perfect 'Texan' - "This? I've had it for months. But, thank you." Always followed by a warm, secret smile.

I didn't share Mother's passing here on The Randy Report when it happened. I kept thinking I would, but I never felt any language worthy of Mother's memory come to me.

I did come across these two quotes that feel right.

“To describe my mother would be to write about a hurricane in its perfect power. Or the climbing, falling colors of a rainbow.”
— Maya Angelou

So thank you to all the mothers out there - the women who make up more of us than we'll ever understand.

“But there's a story behind everything. How a picture got on a wall. How a scar got on your face. Sometimes the stories are simple, and sometimes they are hard and heartbreaking. But behind all your stories is always your mother's story, because hers is where yours begin.”
― Mitch Albom, For One More Day

Here's hoping everyone has a wonderful Mother's Day.

My birth mother, Joyce Ann Slovacek, back in 1958. 
Yeah, you can see it, right...?

Mother's Day

Me with Carlye Hughes (L) and mother Jackie Hughes (R)
I've called Jackie "mother" for over 30 years.  I'm the lucky one.

Regular readers of The Randy Report know there are a few posts that I share annually for special occasions.

This is one of them.

***************************************

Happy Mother's Day wishes to all those fabulous, wonderful mothers who teach and nurture us all.

When I was young, people felt sad for me because my mother passed away at a young age.  But the universe had another plan for me. 

Maybe better...? 

Because so many women were sent my way to teach, support and love on me to bring me to here.  I think wisdom greater than mine knew it would all be more than ok.

This Mother's Day is my first without Jackie Hughes, who I called "Mother" for over 30 years. She passed last summer and nothing will ever be the same. But what she gave me and shaped in me lives on.

I loved the smile in Mother's voice. When she said my name it was musical and lilting. "Rannn-dy." She made me feel like I belonged. She was the center of the Hughes family. And we all knew it.

Memory:  Mother was an expert shopper. EXPERT. She knew how to befriend all the ladies at Neiman Marcus so they would hide items she wanted until they went on serious sale. Double markdowns. Triple markdowns. Then she'd buy. And hide the dresses in the back of the closet for months.

When she'd finally wear them, Coach (Father Hughes was the winningest high school basketball coach in the history of the U.S. - once a coach, always a coach) might compliment her, asking if that was new. She'd reply - in perfect 'Texan' - "This? I've had it for months. But, thank you." Always followed by a warm secret smile.

I never shared Mother's passing last summer here on The Randy Report. I kept thinking I would, but nothing worthy came to mind.

Maybe, I'm still processing the loss. I don't know.

Mothers give a lot of themselves. And give up a lot. Mother Hughes certainly gave me more than she ever knew.

So thank you to all the mothers out there - the women who make up more of us than we'll ever understand.

“But there's a story behind everything. How a picture got on a wall. How a scar got on your face. Sometimes the stories are simple, and sometimes they are hard and heartbreaking. But behind all your stories is always your mother's story, because hers is where yours begin.”
― Mitch Albom, For One More Day

My birth mother, Joyce Ann Slovacek, back in 1958. 
Yeah, you can see it, right...?

Mother's Day 2015

Me with Carlye Hughes (L) and mother Jackie Hughes (R)
I've called Jackie "mother" for over 30 years.  I'm the lucky one.

Happy Mother's Day wishes to all those fabulous, wonderful mothers who teach and nurture us all.

When I was young, people felt sad for me because my mother passed away at a young age.  But the universe had another plan for me.  Maybe better...?  Because so many women were sent my way to teach, support and love on me to bring me to here.  I think wisdom greater than mine knew it would all be more than ok.

This Mother's Day is my first without Jackie Hughes, who I called "Mother" for over 30 years. She passed last summer and nothing will ever be the same. But what she gave me and shaped in me lives on.

How I loved the smile in Mother's voice. When she said my name it was musical and lilting. "Ran-dy." She made me feel like I belonged. She was the center of the Hughes family. And we all knew it.

Memory - Mother was an expert shopper. EXPERT. She knew how to befriend all the ladies at Neiman Marcus so they would hide items she wanted until they went on sale. Double markdowns. Triple markdowns. Then she'd buy. And hide the dresses in the back of the closet for months. When she'd finally wear them, Coach might compliment her, asking if that was new. She'd say - in perfect Texan - "This? I've had it for months. But thank you." LOL

I never shared Mother's passing last summer here on The Randy Report. I kept thinking I would, but nothing worthy came to mind.

Maybe I'm still processing the loss. I don't know.

Mothers give a lot of themselves. And give up a lot. Mother Hughes certainly gave me more than she ever knew.

So thank you to all the mothers out there - the women who make up more of us than we'll ever understand.

“But there's a story behind everything. How a picture got on a wall. How a scar got on your face. Sometimes the stories are simple, and sometimes they are hard and heartbreaking. But behind all your stories is always your mother's story, because hers is where yours begin.”
― Mitch Albom, For One More Day

My mother, Joyce Ann Slovacek, back in 1958. 
Yeah, you can see it, right...?

An Early Mother's Day

This could just as well be my brother Gary and me.

Hysterical. Happy Mother's Day!

Mother's Day: Trans Son Shares How His Mother's Unconditional Love Made A Difference

From Hallmark:

With Mother's Day approaching, Hallmark embarked on a social experiment asking people to talk about their moms on camera and describe their feelings beyond the typical expressions of "I love you" and "thank you." They found that by removing those go-to phrases, the emotion behind the love for their mothers was revealed and they were better prepared to put their heart to paper on Mother's Day.

What they didn't know was that their moms were watching from another room. The videos capture the heartwarming reactions the moms had to their children's words.

Alex shares how his Mom's unconditional love and acceptance made all the difference in this life. Watch what happens when he goes beyond "I love you" and decides to #PutYourHeartToPaper.

Happy Mother's Day 2014

Me with Carlye Hughes (L) and mother Jackie Hughes (R)
I've called Jackie "mother" for over 30 years.  I'm the lucky one.

Happy Mother's Day wishes to all those fabulous, wonderful mothers who teach and nurture us all.

When I was young, people felt sad for me because my mother passed away at a young age.  But the universe had another plan for me.  Maybe better...?  Because so many women went sent my way to teach, support and love on me to bring me to here.  I think wisdom greater than mine knew it would all be more than ok.

I'm sharing pics of two of those women here - Jackie Hughes (above) and Donna McKechnie (below).  Both gave me much in terms of support and the right wisdom at the right time.  I can never thank them enough.

Mothers give a lot of themselves. And give up a lot. There is no doubt.

So thank you to all the mothers out there - the women who make up more of us than we'll ever understand.

Tony Award winner Donna McKechnie and me
Donna would refer to me as "the son she never had" - I love her friendship

My mother, Joyce Ann Slovacek, back in 1958. 
Yeah, you can see it, right...?

Oprah and Starbucks invite you to treat your mom on Mother's Day

Well, this is sweet.  Starbucks includes a lesbian couple of two moms in their new campaign - with voiceover by none other than Oprah herself.

Apparently, if you head to Starbucks on Mother's Day, when you buy yourself an Oprah Chai Tea latte, mom gets one for free.

From Starbucks:

No one has done more for you than she has.  This Mother's Day, give her the thoughtful treat of time with you.

When you bring your mom to a participating Starbucks® store on Sunday, May 11, and buy a Teavana® Oprah Chai Tea latte, hers is on us.

SNL: Kristen Wiig celebrates Mother's Day with 1-800-Flowers

LOL... funny, funny stuff.

Wiig delivers a special 1-800-Flowers commercial, alongside fab and funny Kate McKinnon, in celebration of Mother's Day!

(via Instinct)

The History of Mother's Day

Happy Mother's Day 2012

My mother in the late 1950s.  She passed away when I was 6 years old.

I wrote this last year for the first Mother's Day here on The Randy Report. It still sums up what I feel about the happy day, so I thought I'd repost for those of you who hadn't found TRR yet...

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Dear Mom,

Just wanted to say I'm thinking of you on your day. Even though it's been 42 years since we saw each other, you're on my mind every Mother's Day.

Growing up without you I had so many people say to me "it must have been rough not having a mom" - but they didn't know you had a plan for me the whole time.

I'm always thankful you sent so many fantastic women to be a part of my life along the way. We all definitely need great women around us and I've been so blessed to have them in my life the whole way; whether it was our neighbor across the street Beverly Hardin, my god mother Lee Sullivan, "big Diane" Roberts and "Ma Bell" John Bell's mom in high school or Carlye's mom Jackie, I always felt surrounded by that 'mom energy.' I never felt like a motherless child.

I always knew you were there every step. The day I discovered I had a gift for moving and dancing, I knew where it came from, and I never took credit for that. Your gift opened more doors than imaginable. I lived the dream because of you.

Speaking of 'the dream', thank you for Donna McKechnie who calls me "the son she never had." I never dreamed I would work with my inspiration; and it's always a high to work, talk, and just spend time with her. Sometimes when she laughs, I see you and I know you're here.

And while she wasn't a mother figure to me, more than any other woman in my life, thank you for sending Carlye to me. While my early childhood was kind of splintered, practically my whole life has been grounded in knowing I have family wherever Carlye is. To quote a famous country song: "she's half the man I am."

All these things assured me that I belonged. Somewhere. Wherever I was.

Although time and space may separate us, that's what I've learned about family - there may be distance, but not disconnect.

By the way, that other gift that connects me to you - the cancer journey - thanks for that. I thought of you the whole way. It was a rough ride for both of us, and even though it may look like I came out of it a little better than you in the end, I hope I got the message. Even from the age of six, I remember your courage. And I tried to emulate that every day along the way. Cancer is not just something I see on TV anymore. Having lived it through you and now personally myself, I stop and talk to every child, every woman, every man that's taking that journey. Even if all I have to offer is just a smile and a touch on their shoulder, I let them know we go on. And at the end of all of it we can come out a bit improved, if we pay attention. Thanks for that.

I know where you are today the weather is amazing. I know you and Dad will go dancing on a cloud tonight. That's what you two do.

Tell him I love and miss him. As you know, he did a great job on his own with Gary and me for a long, long time. I smile when I think about you two being together again.

Happy Mother's Day, Mom.

I love you.

p.s. last one - thanks for the blond hair. Michael likes it. Who knows if I'd be married for 17 years without it? One more gift. xoxo

Me and Jackie Hughes - Carlye's mom - the woman I have called Mother for over 30 years.

Mother doesn't want another scarf - she wants marriage equality for her son

Very cool Mother's Day Op-Ed in the New York Daily News:

"This Mother's Day, I don't want another scarf. I don't want any flowers. My dear son can't give me the gift I want now — he's done all he can do. Who would have thought that the best gift this mother could ever receive would come from the New York Legislature?"

"It's time to pass marriage equality legislation. I've got a wedding to plan."

Read the whole piece here.

Zach Wahls on his two moms on Mother's Day

This guy is just a great guy. Clearly his moms did a great job.

And thanks to Zach for contributing to the marriage equality fight.

Dear Mom - on Mother's Day

My mother in the late 1950s.  She passed away when I was 6 years old.

Dear Mom,

Just wanted to say I'm thinking of you on your day. Even though it's been 41 years since we saw each other, you're on my mind every Mother's Day.

Growing up without you I had so many people say to me "it must have been rough not having a mom" - but they didn't know you had a plan for me the whole time.

I'm always thankful you sent so many fantastic women to be a part of my life along the way. We all definitely need great women around us and I've been so blessed to have them in my life the whole way; whether it was our neighbor across the street Beverly Hardin, my god mother Lee Sullivan, "big Diane" Roberts and "Ma Bell" John Bell's mom in high school or Carlye's mom Jackie, I always felt surrounded by that 'mom energy.' I never felt like a motherless child.

I always knew you were there every step. The day I discovered I had a gift for moving and dancing, I knew where it came from, and I never took credit for that. Your gift opened more doors than imaginable. I lived the dream because of you.

Speaking of 'the dream', thank you for Donna McKechnie who calls me "the son she never had." I never dreamed I would work with my inspiration; and it's always a high to work, talk, and just spend time with her. Sometimes when she laughs, I see you and I know you're here.

And while she wasn't a mother figure to me, more than any other woman in my life, thank you for sending Carlye to me. While my early childhood was kind of splintered, practically my whole life has been grounded in knowing I have family wherever Carlye is. To quote a famous country song: "she's half the man I am."

All these things assured me that I belonged. Somewhere. Wherever I was.

Although time and space may separate us, that's what I've learned about family - there may be distance, but not disconnect.

By the way, that other gift that connects me to you - the cancer journey - thanks for that. I thought of you the whole way. It was a rough ride for both of us, and even though it may look like I came out of it a little better than you in the end, I hope I got the message. Even from the age of six, I remember your courage. And I tried to emulate that every day along the way. Cancer is not just something I see on TV anymore. Having lived it through you and now personally myself, I stop and talk to every child, every woman, every man that's taking that journey. Even if all I have to offer is just a smile and a touch on their shoulder, I let them know we go on. And at the end of all of it we can come out a bit improved, if we pay attention. Thanks for that.

I know where you are today the weather is amazing. I know you and Dad will go dancing on a cloud tonight. That's what you two do.

Tell him I love and miss him. As you know, he did a great job on his own with Gary and me for a long, long time. I smile when I think about you two being together again.

Happy Mother's Day, Mom.

I love you.

p.s. last one - thanks for the blond hair. Michael likes it. Who knows if I'd be married for 17 years without it? One more gift. xoxo

Me and Jackie Hughes - Carlye's mom - the woman I have called Mother for over 30 years.